Brand new day, same ‘ol shit!
It’s been quite a while since I last blogged. A lot has happened in all this time. Its not that I didn’t have anything to write about, I just had a little change in priorities. Always thought that this next weekend I’ll find time to dump all the crap I have gathered in my brain into a dark eerie abusive blog. Life doesn’t play by our rules does it… heh… well I got tied up in my own work, the never ending cycle of daily routine that I so despise myself, but I still got myself trapped in it, ironic isn’t it.
So what made me find time to blog again tonight, yeah its 10 PM and I have nothing else to do, my life is pointless and my cable is cut, but there was something else. Its hard to explain exactly what, but a few conversations I had with my friends over the past few days that woke the devil inside of me, who by the way hates the world as we know it, wants to change it, and if it cant change, wants to set everything ablaze and see it burn into ashes from a dark alley with a smile on his face.
Ok so I got a little excited there, but yeah there is this dark side inside of me, the beast within me as I like to call it. It’s inside most of us. It wants change, it hates people that have screwed up your life or hurt you in some way, the stupid idiots that have shit for brains but still influence a larger part of society. The definition is different in different contexts, but the hate is the same. We all wish we’d have a flamethrower or a set of melee weapons to unleash our uncontrollable anger.
Anyways so when I thought about what to write, a lot of things came to mind and ill try to blog about them as time allows me…time allows me, its like if I’m a slave of time, heh… being human is sad sometimes.
After the entire weird prelude, this line hit me, ‘as time allows me’. Time and Life, two words, somehow end up meaning the same. Its like fire, as long as you’re in control of it, you make great use of it. But as soon as it slips out of your hands, it controls you… and eventually consumes you.
Our life, and the never ending routine that controls it. Waking up early in the morning when you’d better be dreaming about that, uhh well whatever you saw the other day at Park towers that fascinated you. Leaving home without breakfast cuz you’d be late and wont get a seat in the so called mini-bus, reach the office after the ‘core time’, be cranky all day cuz of that, end up having stupid arguments with co-workers, leave for home thinking you don’t get paid enough and you don’t get due appreciation for your work, all in all your job sucks. And even though you tried to wake up early and avoid all that, shit still happens, it always does.
So you come home, finally after all the non-stop commute through the 100% pure O2 and noise less streets, you’re hungry, the fridge is empty cause you forgot to buy groceries on the way back, its already 11 PM, you don’t feel like going out, you go to bed on an empty stomach. Lying on the bed you stare at the ceiling, thinking about how your life is a puddle of what’s produced after rotten food indigestion. You think that ‘my life sucks’ is an understatement.
Ever happened to you, maybe not this graphic but it happens to all of us, shit does happen. So what do we do about it, wake up the next morning and go do the exact same full of crap routine all over again.
Ever wondered why? Why we don’t break the cycle, why do we keep on doing all this. I guess not, ‘cause we don’t have time to think about it. We’re so busy in our mindless endless never ending cycle of life that we never stop and wonder about it. Is it about more money, more fame, hotter chicks, faster cars, more respect, and richer hotter prettier chicks? Where does it end, does it even have an end?
Even I do the very same thing, get swamped in the quest for a better life, but sometimes I just get so friggin tired of it that I cant take it anymore, start wondering whats all this for anyways, who am I doing this for, why why why?
So what I do is, go out for a nice walk. Usually people prefer a walk that peaceful, at place where the buzz of the city life cannot be seen or heard of. My walk is a bit different, yeah having a stroll in a silent green park lets you find sanity, peace and tranquility… but it’s like running away from reality, a temporary solution. Next day you have to come back to reality, will all its buzz, noise and pollution. So why drug yourself!? I prefer to go to the busy street near my house, and stroll over there. Imagine the cars passing by you as life passing by, every person in his own world, cars coming and going, non-stop… it feels like life passing by you. You feel like you’ve side stepped from the endless cycle of life, and you pity the people that haven’t. Compile your thoughts, figure out what exactly you want from life, what you wish to do, and not let life control you for a while.
You might not believe me, but the feeling is unreal. The thoughts, the visions, the memories, the words, the people and all that, that’s between them… it all flashes by you, all that is important to you. You gather enough hope to get through another couple of days.
Make time or take time! Side step from the busy street of life for a while, and ask yourself ‘why?’
Ok so this wasn’t as good as the other blogs, but its better than nothing, but do try the busy road stroll sometime, it might not make you want to change your life the next day, but it just might force you to make breakfast for yourself! After all it’s a brand new day with the same old shit!